Hello, I hope you all had a great and productive week! If this is your Friday, happy Friday and welcome to the weekend. If you are in the middle of your week, well then you are half way to your weekend! Always look at the bright side. Thank you reading my blog. Today I am talking to Men about the special Woman in their lives.
Men, I am talking to you today about your Woman, your love, your treasure. I know from listening to a lot of people the troubles people have in the their relationships. One of the common common complaints from Women is “He never listens to me.” Well none of us is given a handbook on how have the perfect relationship, and as far as communication skills go, many of us were not taught effective communication – which includes listening – skills when we were young. I am here to help you with some simple tools like active listening, simple surprises, and of course, meditation.
Men, one of the best things you can ever do to enrich your relationship with the special Woman in your life is to listen. All of us like to be acknowledged, it makes us feel validated and worthy. As men we are not so much “in” to talking. Many of us use very few words. In fact, I can take a five hour trip with my dad, and if we say ten words the whole time, that was still good bonding time. We are just quieter and less communicative by nature. So we need to work at listening, and I am here to tell you that it is not as hard as it might sound to listen effectively.
Effective active listening means devoting your attention to the person that is speaking. That means focusing on the person while they are talking and looking them in the eye. In order to do this, put away any distractions like your phone. Move to a room free of distractions like the tv. Try going somewhere you do not normally sit together, and ask your Woman how her day was. Pay attention to what she is saying, and at the appropriate times in the conversation, affirm what she is saying. Try not to think about your day, or the game, or your bills. Just clear your head and listen.
Try to make this the first interaction you have with your Woman when you walk through the door. We always remember the first and the last, so she will remember the first thing you did when you came home was listen to her. If you are coming home from a busy or hectic day, stop somewhere on the way home to relax (not the bar). Find someplace like a park with open space and something pretty to look at. Use your meditation skills to clear your head. Take several deep breaths, and relax. Plan your entrance into the house. Imagine your love, visualize giving her a hug and walking her to sit down, and hear your words asking her how her day was.
You will be amazed at how much this simple act will deepen and strengthen your relationship. Your validation of her is one of the most precious gifts you can give your Woman. Plus you will find that it does not take much time. Often when we are not in habit of listening, it seems like the person talking to us is going on forever, but in reality, they are not. We are uncomfortable because we are not in the habit of listening, and most likely if you are agitated, it is because you are carrying something with you from the day that is stressing you out. Your mind is still running problems from the day. Use your skills, stop to relax on the way home, and try this simple act.
You will find that it will improve your outlook on life too. There is a reason married men live longer. Women are wise, compassionate, and caring. You Woman loves you and wants the best for you. Listen to what she says, consider her advice, and when she asks you to do something, make a note to do it and tell her when you will get it done, and follow through on what you say. Nurture her with love and attention, validate her, and watch her blossom. It is one of the most beautiful and rewarding experiences you can have in a relationship. And the best part is, it is free! It costs us nothing to listen.
Now, one more thing you can do to help your relationship to bloom, is to surprise your Woman with simple little acts of love. Look for opportunities to take her by surprise to show your love. Make cocoa with little marshmallows in it and sit on the deck. Get up with her in the morning when she is going to work and make her coffee. Make her a snack. Clean something without being asked or told. Don’t expect to be rewarded for that last one and don’t be upset if she doesn’t say anything. She notices, trust me. She watches everything you do. Wait for her to say something, and then be humble and loving in your response.
I work in business development. One of the things I tell people to do while they are in business is to imagine what their lives will be like when the business is gone. In that moment, when you are thinking of what it is like afterward, I tell them to imagine all the things they would tell themselves that they wished they had tried while the business was still theirs. And I tell them to MAKE IT HAPPEN. Don’t wait to do tomorrow what you can do today.
With your loved ones, ESPECIALLY with your Woman, treat her as if it is the last day on Earth. Always kiss her, always hug her, always hold her hand, always do anything you can to enrich your time together. Listen to her. Care about what she has to say. There are no guarantees in life, and the last thing you want is to look back on your time together with regret for not having done something you could have or should have. Imagine your life without her – how does it feel? What do you wish you had done differently? Meditate on this, and listen for the answers, and when they come to you, do not delay. Show her you care and do what you can today.
It is the little things that count when it comes to making a relationship special. One of the best little things you can do, is listen. Start there and work your way outward and upward to doing every little thing you can, as often as you can. You will both be the better for it. Just try it and see.
Thank you for reading my blog, if you have any questions you can email me at seanwescott at live dot com. If you need help with a specific situation, let me know. I will do my best to help!
Have a great night. Go forth, meditate, listen, love and be loved.